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Gone Gone Gone

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I have been gone for over 5 months…I am ashamed to say… and in that time.. I have been on again off again on my journey.. leading me right back to the beginning…UGH!
But I am not going to bang myself in the head about it.. I am just going to move on in the right direction. Thank you to all those who asked my whereabouts.. As I reflect back .. I realize I have been off the wagon way to long.. and for the life of me I can’t understand why..since it seems all I ever do it..diet..and think about losing weight..

So this is a important stepping stone for me.. I am taking a leap of faith here.. and looking up a number to a specialist in weight loss …I don’t want a quick fix.. ok maybe I do want a quick fix..how ever I know they are not out there..I don’t want a fad diet.. I don’t want to have surgery.. I just want to fix me.. make me healthy..is that too much to ask for?

SO today had been a day of reckoning.. for me.. to think how the last five months have passed and I am still in the same spot.. some might say..hey at least you didn’t gain..well that’s probably not a true statement.. because like I said I have been dieting the five months..and I am just at the same place I started..so I more than likely road the roller coaster the last five months..and just by the luck of the draw..checked it at my start point..so my reckoning is that ..this has to stop.. I need to get serious…NOW! I can’t wish it away.. I can’t let someone do it for me.. I have to do it..and I know that.. I’ve always known that.. but now I have to do it..why the change? why the urgent need? Well several reason really..

#1 I fill like shit.. energy level is zero..look like crap..feel unhealthy…look unhealthy..and I want to change..
#2 I want to live.. there I said it.. after all how many 1oo pound 80 year olds do you see? laugh as you might.. but you don’t..as I creep upon 60 that is only 20 years off..now is the time.. I don’t want to cut myself short!
#3 I want to enjoy my retirement years.. travel..see the rest of the world.. but at this rate I am good if I can walk the block.. I see my breathing changing.. my heart racing.. I only hope I haven’t caused irreplaceable damage to myself..
#4 this weight is too much to carry around anymore.. I’m done.. I’m over it..and I am breaking up with it.. got the T-Shirt and moving on.
#5 I don’t want to be an embarrassment to my family. Although I know I am. I know they love me..but how can you not be ashamed of my out of control eating.. I must be lick the drugging or alcoholic in the family.. no one ever speaks about..
#6 Grandbaby…yes I am going to be a grandma..for the first time in December.. YIPPEEE! I have wanted to be one for as long as I can remember.. I want to get on the floor and play..give piggy back rides..make tents from a sheet and card table..I want to go to the park and play with my grandchild..not sit on the sidelines.. I know that this isn’t the only reason to lose weight..but it sure is a good one! IT’s going to be wonderful to have a little one around ..it’s been so long..even though we are living miles apart.. I want to be in my grandchild’s life as much as possible!

Goals…yes we must set goals in our lives..and do our best to obtain them or..we are just fluttering around like a fish out of water.. if we don’t set goals and strive to met them..we end up no where!

After many hours of soul searching and mindful thinking.. I have developed a plan of attack.. I have declared this BEV TIME! I am preparing my fight against food.. and by GOD I am going to beat this..
Plan of attack
#1 Stay focused..journal everyday.. keeping the task at hand on my mind in my thoughts.. not obsessively. But positively.
#2 Make a food plan.. weekly and stick with it.. plan for it.. plan for snacks.. keeping something in my purse/car incase of emergency’s. Decide what is best for you
#3 Exercise.. daily.. anything.. swim, walk, weights, just do it
#4 Develop a core group of like people who want to do what I am doing..share ideals..thoughts and goals and ideals on how to get there. be a support system for each others.. Maybe meet once a week to discus our week.
#5. Realize you are addicted to food.. no it’s not drug..or alcohol.. but never the less it’s a addiction..admitting it and doing something about it.. is a step in the right direction.
#6 OA continue to go to phone meetings and try to attend a meeting in person once a month. The support will be invaluable.
#7 Figure out my trigger foods and eliminate them from my home.. ( not to say that I can’t ever in my life have them again.. but right now.. I can’t handle them.. or I wouldn’t be where I am today.
#8 Seek doctors support and guidance.. have him follow progress
#9 Talk with a dietitian find out the cost and pay it.. maybe the best advice you ever get.
#10 Realize my plans can be altered if something is not working.. be flexible.. but don’t give yourself an excuse to eat.
#11 Check in with yourself Daily.. what worked what didn’t work..it’s a plan not a bible..it can be revised
#12 Set many goals..and reward yourself in small ways for reaching them.(ie. nails done.. movie..etc)
#13 Don’t set yourself up for failure. Make it real
#14 NO FAST FOOD. PERIOD nothing is good about it.. cut it out completely
#15 Eat only when hungry
#16 Drink water..PERIOD
#17 Eat Healthy no processed food..
#18 Constantly be on the look out for new hobbies that get you moving.. new recipes that are healthy..
#19 Make a graph to follow your weight loss
#20 Make a Vision board.. if you can dream it you can be it!
#21 Shut off the TV! Limit your TV intake.. get up and keep moving.. this may be hard at first.. but after awhile it will be come second nature.
#22. Sleep Get plenty of it..7-8 hours.. regardless!
#23 Make yourself priority! This is you time. .and yes, damit ..its all about what is best for you!
#24 Believe it! Believe in your ability to accomplish your goals..
#25 Make you goals obtainable. be realistic about your journey
This my plan of attack.. I may go back and tweak it..in the months to come.. but I will be living this..everyday..even after I reach my goal. I know that fighting my addiction to food..will be a life long battle.. but I am bound to make it a victory!

So come along and join me.. don’t just watch on the sidelines.. be apart of this exciting new found journey..watch out ..cause I just might be sliding into home plate..with a victory on this one!
Cheers!
Beverlynew2

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One thought on “Gone Gone Gone

  1. Reblogged this on ourhealthylifestylejourney and commented:

    kick starting again!

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